Small talk, by Michael Berenz

Many times during your workday you need to make small talk. People often think small talk is unimportant, yet it ‘oils the wheels’ of your working day. Usually you need to keep small talk ‘small’, but sometimes you want to develop it into a longer conversation. What are you going to talk about? Food is always a popular topic.

The other week I had  lunch at Phu Thai to help farewell a group of professional writers from Thailand. Everyone’s eyes grew bigger as dish after dish of colourful food was brought to our table. I had a special dish of Pad Thai which had rice noodles with tofu and spring onions. This sounds very plain but it had delightful subtle flavours that brought it to life. With fresh salad on the side,  lemon and orange slices to squeeze over the noodles, and plenty of fresh coriander, the whole dish was delicious. This was a great introduction to Thai food. Phu Thai is on the corner of Vivian and Tory Street in Wellington.

When something good happens and then something extra and also good is added, that’s the icing on the cake.

Photo by Michael Berenz

Many times during your workday you need to make small talk. People often think small talk is unimportant, yet it ‘oils the wheels’ of your working day. Usually you need to keep small talk ‘small’, but sometimes you want to develop it into a longer conversation. What are you going to talk about? Food is always a popular topic. 

We have a lot of birthdays in our family from July to September, and we recently celebrated one of them at Red Ginger on Tory Street in Wellington. My meal was called ‘Buddha’s Delight’ and it was a delicious mix of noodles, mushrooms, vegetables and tofu in a beancurd sauce. A feature of the dish was some kind of seaweed, which added amazing texture.

Red Ginger describe their food as contemporary Asian cuisine and everything about their establishment feels contemporary. It’s a large space with creamy white walls accented by warm red. Furnishings are clean blonde wood and bamboo plants add atmosphere.

Best of all, staff were very friendly and allowed us to bring our own birthday cake and candles. When they brought it out for us, the other guests in the restaurant spontaneously joined us in singing ‘happy birthday’ to our special person. For me Red Ginger is fresh, friendly and flavoursome.

Photo by Michael Berenz

Many times during your workday you need to make small talk. People often think small talk is unimportant, yet it ‘oils the wheels’ of your working day. Usually you need to keep small talk ‘small’, but sometimes you want to develop it into a longer conversation. What are you going to talk about? Try the movie ’127 Hours’.

Aron Ralston is passionate about the outdoors and about challenging himself in difficult environments. One weekend he goes out hiking in the remote Utah canyons and in a freak accident his arm is trapped by a heavy rock at the bottom of a canyon. Over the next 127 hours he relies on thoughts and images of family and friends to get him through, while facing the terrifying choice he must make if he is to free himself.

This movie is a true story and is both horrifying and uplifting. Watch it if you’re keen on extreme sports, fascinating rock formations, creative problem solving, or the spirit that keeps people going in desperate situations.

“Let’s just play it by ear”, I replied, as I wanted to keep our options open.

Playing it by ear means deciding how to deal with a situation as it develops, rather than making plans beforehand. I suppose it comes from playing music by ear rather than following written notes.

Photo: 2009, Susan E. Adams

I’m now back in Wellington, New Zealand, having completed my ten month teaching stint in France. After stepping off the plane and greeting my smiling family (armed with a Welcome Home sign) we headed straight to Maranui café in Lyall Bay. A view of the Pacific, good coffee and New Zealand baking. How much I missed that!

I have been on a high for the last few days, moving through “my” city as if on a cloud. Everything seems so easy and familiar, like putting on an old snuggly jersey. I don’t feel the slightest shred of anxiousness that if someone speaks to me, I won’t understand what they are saying. In France, I lived with that slight feeling of anxiousness constantly. As a second language speaker you are always alert, always waiting for the next opportunity to flex the foreign language muscle. Perhaps that’s why, now I’m back, I feel ridiculously full of energy. All the energy that I was expending to speak French is now superfluous and is looking for a way out!

The challenge for me now is to seek out opportunities to speak French in New Zealand. I want to hold onto that feeling of alertness and engagement which comes when speaking a foreign language. It will also be important to feel comfortable switching regularly between French and English, a skill in itself and one I don’t necessarily have yet.

One of the reasons people travel, I think, is for the opportunity to learn about themselves, as much as the countries they travel to. The stuff I learnt went way beyond knowledge of the French language. I learnt about dealing with stress, for example. When I found myself on a dark highway in driving rain in the early hours of the morning, driving in circles trying to find the exit to get back to my town, I tried to let logic and clear thinking prevail. I remembered thinking that things could be worse, after all. As long as you have your health, and a bit of money, few difficult situations are insurmountable. 

There is a Maori proverb that says “He aha te mea nui? He tangata, he tangata, he tangata.” Which means: “What is the most important thing in the world? It is people, it is people, it is people”. That quote has so much more significance for me now. When you are far from home, in a culture you don’t know, the relationships that you build with those around you are of utmost importance. Establishing your community and your support network where you are. And, if you are lucky like I was, being able to keep in contact with your support network back home.

Now I am excited about taking what I have learned and putting it to use in Wellington. It will be important for me as I embark on my next adventure: finding a job. Wish me luck!

Mihiata  – Wellington, New Zealand

Photo by Michael Berenz

Many times during your workday you need to make small talk. People often think small talk is unimportant, yet it ‘oils the wheels’ of your working day. Usually you need to keep small talk ‘small’, but sometimes you want to develop it into a longer conversation. What are you going to talk about? Places, movies, books, and food are all a good start. Watch as Leo leads you through Te Papa. 

• Entrance to Te Papa
• Walking up to the Marae
• The Marae   
• By the Treaty of Waitangi

It’s my final week of teaching! My sejour in France is rapidly coming to a close. So rapidly, in fact, that I’m feeling a little overwhelmed. It’s time to wind back the clock and close down everything that I put so much effort into setting up when I first arrived: shut down my bank account; terminate my Internet contract; return my trusty blue and green bike (sniff!).

It feels strange. It feels like I am going backwards, rather than forwards. But I try and see it as an opportunity to deepen my understanding of how “stuff” works in France, only this time I’m closing things down rather than opening them up.

There are lots of “end of” events going on, as schools and clubs prepare to close down for the summer. All of my schools put on a Fete de l’Ecole, a small end of year celebration for the kids and their families, with performances by students, stalls, music and pony rides. I made sure to get along to two of them and it was really lovely to see the kids’ excitement and join in on the fun outside of the classroom.

Last weekend I checked out an evening of African dance and music in the park next to where I live. It was only small, but it was special. A group of drummers were seated or standing in the middle of the crowd, and women clothed in all colours, pinks, yellows, greens, would come into the middle of the circle and dance a crazy joyful dance to the beat, kicking up their feet and knees at rather amazing angles. My friend Pedro told me every evening in Senegal is like this, dancing and drumming everywhere, and the women miss it.

Meanwhile, I’ve been readying myself to say farewell to Saint Nazaire. The thought of saying goodbye to all the people I have met in France, and have lived with and worked with over the past ten months, is strange indeed. Will I see them again? Will we manage to stay in touch once we’re living on different sides of the earth? Part of me would like to hit the pause button and stay in this moment forever… But, time won’t be waiting for me. So I will be busy reminding myself that change is inevitable, while growth, however, is optional.

Mihiata  -  Saint Nazaire, France